I am the Audience

Insomnia cure

May 24, 2025

a day in this life

A few years ago, I found an app that is designed to help manage insomnia. I don’t have a bad case. But, I do have time of erratic sleep. So, I tried the free week and gave them $40 for a year’s subscription.

The way it functions is that you wear earbuds while a gentle voice tells you a story as you do a color-by-number picture with soft music in the background. We think there are binaural beats in the music to help your brain settle down.

Because you have 3 things going on (beats, coloring, getting a story) your monkey mind gets distracted enough to allow you to relax and sleep.

It was effective enough that, after a while, I fell asleep as soon as I turned it on.

Recently, I have been having a nap in the afternoon fairly frequently. I think the word puzzles I do at the end of my daily online habit are serving the same function. They distract my brain from my work frets just enough to encourage it to shut down and rest a bit.

Or perhaps I’ve just been tired enough that sleep happens.
David La Chapelle – Three Graces (Male)

May 23, 2025

art, Beautiful

We went to Winston-Salem yesterday and one of our stops was The North Carolina Museum of Art – Winston Salem, formerly Southeastern Center for Contemporary Art. We have not loved the merger of the 2 museums because they seem to be setting everything up as “go to the other one to see the rest of the exhibition” and they’re 102 miles apart.

That said, the part of this exhibition that’s at SECCA rocked my socks. The black-and-white abstractionist nonrealist photographer I was with wasn’t particularly taken with it.

I only took a picture of this piece, not because I only loved the one. But, because I was overwhelmed. Kind of like the first time I saw the Aldwyth exhibition at the Gregg in Raleigh. But, I did go back to Aldwyth and I did take pictures. I may do the same thing about this. It’s up for a couple more months. So, I can.

This is a photograph and it is huge. The people in it are larger than life size.

La Chapelle went to high school at UNC School of the Arts. When he was 17 he went to NYC where he met Andy Warhol and eventually went to work for Interview magazine. I believe that meeting was fortunate for both of them. And me.

There were some themed collections, several individual pieces and a wall of famous portraits.

Since the NCMA is running things now, you have to pay to go. But, it’s less than $10 and worth it to me to go again. I need ot do it before July 20. I really want to show you more of this. It is aging well in my mind.
My wildflower!

May 20, 2025

a day in this life, dirt under my nails, Laughing, plants

We had 2 bald patches in our yard last Fall. One was from a burn pile and the other was the last remnant of the labyrinth. We pulled the useless plastic up from the center of the labyrinth and bought some wildflower seeds. One bag for each spot.

Chuck has mowed around them to allow the wildflowers to grow.

We have wheat.

That’s the middle of the back yard with a lavender in the middle of the picture and some lilies that aren’t blooming yet in the back. The Turk’s cap lilies that haven’t been nibbled by deer are on the far right by a patch of yarrow and a rock that had been meant for a resting spot in the labyrinth. It was delivered by a friend with a truck and is going to live there forever.

And one little blue flower.
14 weeks and counting down

May 19, 2025

a day in this life

When I was on vacation in December, I got a phone call from a coworker warning me that I would be coming back to turmoil. Our “Baylor shift,” 30 hours every weekend and paid for 40, was being cut. We had a week to decide which of our options we would go with. I was not expected back to work until the week was over. I had worked that shift for nearly 12 years and intended to go for 5 and a half more.

When I got home from my trip, Chuck and I discussed which option we thought was most tolerable. I did not want to go back to getting up and on the road at 7:00 in the morning. I didn’t particularly want to deal with that many people around me any more. But, I didn’t think I was ready to quit working, yet, either. So, we went with second shift. I knew there were openings.

Five days a week, 8 hours a day, instead of 2 12-hour days and a 6, with 4 days off kind of sounded do-able. Not working as long sounded easier on my body.

When management called me on Monday to discuss what was going on, I played dumb. But, I also played hardball. I was absolutely not going to be railroaded into something any more unacceptable than I could help. When I said “second shift” they offered a Tuesday to Saturday slot. I told them I absolutely was not coming off a weekend-only 3-days-on-4-days-off shift to still work all weekend. And second shift on Saturday means Sunday is shot. They told me corporate wasn’t allowing any positions that were Monday to Friday. I said I would take Sunday to Thursday. Or I could look for a place somewhere else in the building.

They worked it out.

So, I have been working Sunday to Thursday, 6:00pm to 2:30am. That accomodates our workflow and the other changes that have been happening lately.

That means my off time has been dramatically limited. Two days a week to cram everything in with a little wiggle room on work days. And having to be done, no matter what, at 5:00pm. Nothing in the afternoon is particularly leisurely because I’m always waiting to get ready for work. “Do I have time to do this and get cleaned up before I have to leave the house?”

Then, one Sunday, Chuck said, “I really miss you.” and I was done.

I looked up my Social Security benefits and my 401(k), did some calculating and decided that retirement is possible. I will have less to work with than I would if I held out. But, Medicare kicks in in July and quality of life matters.

I started talking to Fidelity last week about how to use the 401(k) and I intend to do the Medicare thing this week. I’m going to give us August to feel secure that everything financial is turned on.

My last day of work will be August 28. Labor Day weekend is going to be novel this year.

14 weeks, 69 work days. (I already have some vacation time planned.)

Tick, tick, tick…
Mrs. Humm on the feeder

May 19, 2025

a day in this life, birdwatching