• The S-word.

    April 1, 2015
    a day in this life, family, Laughing

    When my son was 3and a half years old, he came home from daycare telling that a boy had gotten in trouble for saying a bad word.  

    I said, “What did he say?”  And my child looked at me me like I was stupid.

    “I can’t say it.  It is a bad word.”

    “Well, you aren’t saying it as a bad word. You are just telling me.”

    He cut his eyes at me like he wasn’t sure I wasn’t setting him up for trouble and lowered his voice. Mind you, there was no one else in our house.  

    “He said the s-word.”

    “Shit?”

    At this point, he was totally exasperated with me. 

    “No, Mom.  He said,” and his voice dropped to a whisper, “‘shut up.’”

    He didn’t understand why that cracked me up.  But, I did agree with him that “shut up” is a very rude thing to say.

  • Vanitas

    March 28, 2015
    dancing in the field of dreams

    DSC05457This is my bad photography of François Desportes’s Urn of Flowers with Fruit and Hare at the NC Museum of Art.

    I learned about vanitas still lifes in the winter of 2012.  The museum had an exhibition of Still-Life Masterpieces: A Visual Feat from the Museum of Fine Arts, Boston.  I wasn’t enthusiastic about the exhibition, but it was available to wander through during the holiday gala; so, we did.

    And, we learned something important.  We learned about the style of still life that is a memento mori.  Some of them are pretty heavy handed.  Full of skulls and clocks and hourglasses.  Others are more subtle.  There will be flowers in vases that would only last for a day, never for the amount of time that was necessary to paint them.  Or less than perfect fruit that has bruises on it.  Sometimes, there will be Spring flowers with Autumn fruit.

    This painting is a great example of the second kind.  Notice the bruises on the peaches.  And the irises in a vase with morning glories.  The lapin corpse and grey butterfly aren’t so subtle.  But, I really enjoy this painting.

  • Volcanoes!!!!

    March 26, 2015
    a day in this life, Beautiful

    I could never be a vulcanologist (Look it up.  It’s the right word.)  But, I am fascinated by volcanoes.  I love to watch lava flow, from the safe distance of video.

    What do you think?

  • Matters of taste

    March 26, 2015
    a day in this life, food & drink

    When my son was 3 or 4 years old, he couldn’t understand why I didn’t like the same foods he did.  He would say “You liked it when YOU were my age!” frustrated that sharing wasn’t working.  But, he was appalled by some of the things I put in my mouth, too.

    One day, I found an article about taste buds.  It said that in the variety and fluctuations that are our bodies, we get a whole new set about every 5 years.  And that what tastes lovely to us now may get a completely different reading in 5 years.  I told Christopher about that and we figured that I am 6 taste bud cycles ahead of him.  That made sharing tastes, and not agreeing about them, more palatable, so to speak.

    Several years later, I learned that a dear friend has a recessive  genetic trait that causes cilantro to taste like soap to her.  My husband adores cilantro.  He adds extra to his salsa, tacos, salads.  Clearly, he doesn’t have the recessive gene.  I taste the soap if there is a lot of cilantro.  I suspect that I am heterozygous.

    Another instance of taste bud variations involves cardamom.  Chuck keeps me supplied with granola.  Since he makes it, it is exactly how I like it.  He was making it for himself, too, when we weren’t living together.  He likes cardamom and added it to his batch.  I was visiting and tried it.  I was completely overwhelmed by the cardamom.  The next time he made it, he decreased it significantly so that I could taste it, but not be overwhelmed.  The problem with that was, he couldn’t even tell it was there.

    The upshot of all this taste variation awareness is that our response to “That’s too sweet” or “Ew. You have all of that.” is to laugh at how different bodies are.

  • Death, be not proud

    March 25, 2015
    dancing in the field of dreams

    I think I have always had a curiosity about what people do at the end of life, their own and the lives of people they know.  Funeral rites, grieving, afterlife beliefs, all intrigue me.

    I remember being left in the car while my grandparents went to a funeral because they thought I was too young to go and, besides, I didn’t know the man who had died. I was curious to know what happened at a funeral and was really annoyed not to be allowed to go.  They were probably right, though.  I’d have been asking questions the whole time and annoyed everyone there.

    I think I was 4 or 5 at the time.

    Because of that fascination, I tend to enjoy wandering in old cemeteries.  I take pictures of the markers and look  for the stories of the family, such as I can puzzle out.  I am intrigued by the symbols used on the tombstones and fascinated by the elaborate decorations and money spent.  The vast tracts of land that are used to grown stones from boxes of bones make me scratch my head, too.  There are monuments to people who are remembered by no one living.

    I tend to have an outside-looking-in view when someone I know is dealing with the death of a loved one, even when it is one of my own relatives.  I don’t believe in life after death.  I believe all time is Now, we just see it from somewhen that is limited because we are experiencing Eternity from the pinhole of our hereandnow perspective.

    This means that I try to make the hereandnow good and hold it in my memory with love.

    http://www.graveaddiction.com/symbol.html

    http://msghn.org/usghn/symbols.html

    http://www.thecemeteryclub.com/symbols.html

    My photos of Elmwood Cemetery, Charlotte, NC

    My photos of Laurel Hill Cemetery, Philadelphia, PA

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