I am the Audience

Watching together

January 25, 2023

family

I do not remember going to the movies with only my dad. I vaguely remember going to the drive-in with both of my parents when I was wee, before I had sisters. and I remember being in the car with the sound box in the window more than I remember the movie, although I’ve been told that’s where I saw Snow White the first time.

Our parents did take all of their daughters to see Blazing Saddles. They had already been to see it and wanted to watch us when the cowboys had beans around the campfire. My sisters were 9 and 7; I was 14.

My mother, grandmother and I went to see Mary, Queen of Scots together. I was shocked by the murder of Lord Dudley. They were surprised by that. Kate said, “You knew he was murdered.” I said, “I guess I didn’t expect to watch it happen.” The only other movie I ever saw with my grandmother was Titanic and she was ready to leave after the ship sank. The love story was uninteresting to her. I believe she thought it was going to be a documentary.

I watched television with my dad. Laugh In. M*A*S*H. Hee Haw. Carol Burnette. I remember the 3 of us watching Ed Sullivan and Red Skelton together. But, when I was older, my mother either did other things while we watched those shows or didn’t really participate in the laughing and commentary.

One of her oddities was her loathing of day time soap operas but love of the night time ones. She did everything she could to stop me watching All My Children and Dark Shadows. I assumed she thought Dark Shadows would give me nightmares. But, I think she just hated that it was a soap opera. I binged AMC 2 or 3 times in my life, watching for a few weeks and then getting tired of it and leaving it alone for years. She always rolled her eyes and nagged me about watching it.f

But, my parents watched the night time soaps together and she loved them. Dallas and Knots Landing were never missed. Except by me. I thought they were stupid, the people and the stories. And not in an amusing way. The 30 minute day time shows amused me and the 60 minute night time shows did not.
Blue cheese

January 15, 2023

food & drink

I have 3 kinds of blue cheese in my fridge. I got Roquefort, Gorgonzola and Stilton at Trader Joe’s to see if I can tell them apart and/or care about the differences.

So, of course, Chuck prefers one and I prefer another.

I really only have a preference when I’m eating them at the same time. Individually, I like them all.
My orchid

January 2, 2023

a day in this life
Many years ago, (a decade? longer? less?) I found a Phalenopsis at the grocery that was absolutely lovely. I have never been successful with orchids, as much as I love them, and had given up bringing them home with me. It hurt my feelings to see them die in my care.

But, this orchid had a tag that said I could keep it healthy and happy if I would but 3 ice cubes on it once a week. It was relatively inexpensive so I brought it home.

And it didn’t die.

When the blossoms finally withered, the stem they had grown on remained green. I am a believer in leaving green alone until it finishes producing food for the plant. A new stem grew off the side of the original one and made more blooms. That’s the first time I ever got new growth on an orchid.

Eventually, I got it an orchid pot. And, again, it didn’t die when I transplanted it. (That’s the new pot in the picture.)

But, it didn’t bloom for a couple of years. I was about to give up on new blossoms when we went to a show by the local orchid society. I asked one of the members about my plant he suggested fresh growing medium and orchid food spray.

I did both things. After 3 or 4 months of no change, I was about to give up completely when I saw a stem starting. It bloomed and the blossoms lasted a long time on that single stem.

Last Fall, I got another stem of flowers and have left the stem alone while it remained green, even though the blossoms have been gone for months.

It’s rewarding me with another bloom branch and appears to have 2 buds forming.
Descartes before the….?

December 25, 2022

dancing in the field of dreams
Taking my 3 year old out for dinner

November 30, 2022

a day in this life, family, food & drink

Actually, they were probably 2 and a half. I was still sharing space with my first husband in Charleston, South Carolina but, functioning as a single parent. I’ve forgotten where he was. It doesn’t matter. I wanted food I had not prepared for myself and served to me. I wanted some graciousness. We had been going out to eat with my parents for their whole life so restaurants weren’t entirely alien. This was just our first time solo.

I called an Italian restaurant down the road to see if they needed a reservation. They did not. It was the middle of the week and a fairly quiet evening.

We dressed up. My child has always loved to dress for festive occasions and knew that this meant we were doing something special.

When the host saw my date, his eyes got big for a moment. I said, “If there is a problem, we can leave.” He recovered and said, “Oh no. Right this way.” and led us to a booth. “I’m afraid we don’t have any high chairs or boosters.” I said. “We’ll be fine without that.”

A couple across the room saw us and looked worried as they leaned in to talk to each other, shooting glances at us as they talked. Other heads had turned as we walked across the room.

My date had water, glass half full, with a straw and spaghetti with meat sauce, skip the salad. I had unsweetened tea, salad and some other dish. We chatted as we waited.

They were a little messy eating and decided to sit on my side of the table so it was easier for me to help manage the pasta. The only mess was their face, though. Not the tablecloth or the floor. And they stayed with me. No trying to investigate the room. I had decided before we left the house that if any of that started, I would pay and we would leave.

When the waiter brought our check, he had gone from the nervous young man darting looks at my companion to all smiles. He said, “Please, come again. It has been a delight to serve you.”

The other diners around the room smiled at us as we walked by and nodded at the child with a little tomato sauce on their sweater.

The smiling host held the door for us and invited us to return any time.

This is one of the snapshot memories I have of my little child.

Another is two years later. They had samosas while I ate saag paneer at a booth in Greensboro. The Indian restaurant was a little more casual and my child was 4. The staff was quite sanguine about a child dining with their mother.

We’re going out for Indian food this Saturday. They will be 31 on Sunday. Exactly half my age. They say it feels like they’re catching up to me.